Post deliciousness at UVA, we walked a street down to Stumble Inn where I discovered that there was a beer pong table available. I'd heard previously about this place, according to the locals - the food is great, especially for bar food (aka - gastropub grub). Of course, having just come from a very nice italian dinner, we were exactly gunning for stuffed burgers and fries. So no food was consumed here unless you consider beer, food.
However, the bar was loaded with TVs which could translate to an excellent place for Sunday Pro-Football games! The ambiance was OK, it was definitely a locals spot, it wasn't very crowded but we also didn't get there until 1 - 1:30AM. They have great drink deals throughout the week as well so it makes for a great spot to hang out with friends, post work, or for watching sports!
Name: The Stumble Inn
Cuisine: American, Bar Food
Prices: Recession Friendly =)
The Review: See above.
The verdict? I would have to go back for the full experience versus just a couple of quick drinks! But I would go back to re-experience!
I just wanna say that I just realized I covered Saturday (10/3) without even covering Friday (10/2). Ridiculousness. Well that day we started with dinner at Broadway Station and then moved it to Station Square (Beer Garden with Sangria on tap!!!). But that's for another blog! Ciao!
Monday, October 5, 2009
Saturday (10/3) Shenanigans Part 2 - Uva
Well post Mee Noodle Shop, Mike and I walked to Union Square to check out the Mid-Autumn Festival that was taking place. It just turned out to be another street fair, when in fact, I was really hoping for a little more. Oh well. So then we wandered down into the West Village, where it became very apparent that I hadn't done much wandering down LaGuardia Place. That's what I love about NYC, there's still so much I haven't explored. Well we walked around SOHO shopping for a dress for my sister's upcoming engagement party (which turned out to be an unsuccessful venture, sigh). We didn't get back to the apartment until 9PM!!!
So, we had planned to be out of the apartment by 10PM (after we both took a shower, I know. Smart, eh?) to head out and find a late dinner. Well let's just say we didnt' get out of the door until 11PM. Yikes!
Now for all of y'all who know me really well and know how much I need to be constantly eating and how quickly I can crash if I don't eat shortly after feeling hunger, let's just say I was feeling hungry at 10PM. By the time we left at 11PM I was already hit the bottom of the barrel in terms of speed of irritability, patience, and anger. We decided to walk up on 2nd Avenue and go up town as we normally head down town.
Well Mike was being a little indecisive and then decided to tell me that I should make a choice and I was trying so hard to just stand up from lack of energy that my irritation was clear and in full bloom! LOL! I felt bad but I couldn't help it b/c poor Mike wasn't ever given any warning in regards to this part of me, so he wasn't sure what to do.
Well we decided to walk up to this new sidewalk pizza cafe called "Gina". When Mike asked if they were still seating for dinner, the waiter didn't even bother to speak he just used a hand gesticulation in the form of cutting off his own neck, which is what I felt like doing to the waiter. Rude! Could you please say something instead of just being flipant and gesticulating?! What the eff was that all about!? The minute I saw him do that, I started walking away, lol, my next action would have been to give him a piece of my very starved and angry mind! Haha, totally unproductive. So I walked away. Then we stopped at another italian joint half a block down called Spigolo. The waitress standing outside was much more polite and informed us that their kitchen was closed but that 2 streets down was a restaurant by the name of UVA and their kitchen was open until 2AM. So we make our way in that direction.
The hostess at UVA was very pleasant and confirmed that the kitchen was open until 2AM and we sat down, FINALLY, for dinner at 11:45PM. I was soo weak I had to lean against the wall for support. So here is my review of UVA:
Name: UVA
Cuisine: Italian
Address: 1486 Second Avenue @ 77th Street
Price: Average for an Italian restaurant, if you're trying to save and cash strapped, you would be better off doing some appetizers (which are more reasonably priced and well portioned).
Service: Fair. I can't say it was anything special, but they were nice and responded quickly when requested or called.
The Review:
Appetizer - Mike and I ordered the Polenta stuffed with Robiola Cheese and a black truffle sauce ($9)! We were in consideration of the Fondue that was part of the "Late Night" menu, which I find wonderful, but decided that the Fondue would be excessive for two! Not many restaurants have that option and options are BIG for me *^_~* (Wink wink!) The Polenta on first gander seems rather small and scant. However, upon sinking your fork into the Polenta you realize that it's made more grits-like because of the Robiola Cheese that's melted inside of it. The Robiola cheese gave the polenta a very nice thick consistency and the black truffle sauce was a very nice complement that did not overpower the mild Robiola and polenta. However, I felt that it could have been a little bit saltier (which I never say btw). I looked at the bread on my platillo and realized that I could use the polenta as a spread on the bread and the bread gave it that perfect saltiness that I was looking for! It was a wonderful dish that paired perfectly with the bread! If you go to UVA, I highly recommend the Polenta!
Main Dish - Me (Saltimbocca di Pollo, $18) which is a chicken in a light mushroom brown sauce over a bed of spinach. I would say that it would mostly be likened to a chicken marsala. However, the sauce is much lighter and the chicken breast was cooked perfectly! It was very moist! Mike ordered the Ravioli, which was also equally as delicious. It was also very different looking from a normal ravioli dish. Most ravioli dishes have little raviolis but this dish was like one big ravioli! It was very aesthetically pleasing and even more so for the taste buds, although I only had a small bite and Mike would be a better judge of the Ravioli! LOL!
We didn't get dessert as we were running a little late to meet up with Mike's friend. As an overall, I would definitely return here, especially if we were stuck up in the UES late at night with little or no options available again.
So, we had planned to be out of the apartment by 10PM (after we both took a shower, I know. Smart, eh?) to head out and find a late dinner. Well let's just say we didnt' get out of the door until 11PM. Yikes!
Now for all of y'all who know me really well and know how much I need to be constantly eating and how quickly I can crash if I don't eat shortly after feeling hunger, let's just say I was feeling hungry at 10PM. By the time we left at 11PM I was already hit the bottom of the barrel in terms of speed of irritability, patience, and anger. We decided to walk up on 2nd Avenue and go up town as we normally head down town.
Well Mike was being a little indecisive and then decided to tell me that I should make a choice and I was trying so hard to just stand up from lack of energy that my irritation was clear and in full bloom! LOL! I felt bad but I couldn't help it b/c poor Mike wasn't ever given any warning in regards to this part of me, so he wasn't sure what to do.
Well we decided to walk up to this new sidewalk pizza cafe called "Gina". When Mike asked if they were still seating for dinner, the waiter didn't even bother to speak he just used a hand gesticulation in the form of cutting off his own neck, which is what I felt like doing to the waiter. Rude! Could you please say something instead of just being flipant and gesticulating?! What the eff was that all about!? The minute I saw him do that, I started walking away, lol, my next action would have been to give him a piece of my very starved and angry mind! Haha, totally unproductive. So I walked away. Then we stopped at another italian joint half a block down called Spigolo. The waitress standing outside was much more polite and informed us that their kitchen was closed but that 2 streets down was a restaurant by the name of UVA and their kitchen was open until 2AM. So we make our way in that direction.
The hostess at UVA was very pleasant and confirmed that the kitchen was open until 2AM and we sat down, FINALLY, for dinner at 11:45PM. I was soo weak I had to lean against the wall for support. So here is my review of UVA:
Name: UVA
Cuisine: Italian
Address: 1486 Second Avenue @ 77th Street
Price: Average for an Italian restaurant, if you're trying to save and cash strapped, you would be better off doing some appetizers (which are more reasonably priced and well portioned).
Service: Fair. I can't say it was anything special, but they were nice and responded quickly when requested or called.
The Review:
Appetizer - Mike and I ordered the Polenta stuffed with Robiola Cheese and a black truffle sauce ($9)! We were in consideration of the Fondue that was part of the "Late Night" menu, which I find wonderful, but decided that the Fondue would be excessive for two! Not many restaurants have that option and options are BIG for me *^_~* (Wink wink!) The Polenta on first gander seems rather small and scant. However, upon sinking your fork into the Polenta you realize that it's made more grits-like because of the Robiola Cheese that's melted inside of it. The Robiola cheese gave the polenta a very nice thick consistency and the black truffle sauce was a very nice complement that did not overpower the mild Robiola and polenta. However, I felt that it could have been a little bit saltier (which I never say btw). I looked at the bread on my platillo and realized that I could use the polenta as a spread on the bread and the bread gave it that perfect saltiness that I was looking for! It was a wonderful dish that paired perfectly with the bread! If you go to UVA, I highly recommend the Polenta!
Main Dish - Me (Saltimbocca di Pollo, $18) which is a chicken in a light mushroom brown sauce over a bed of spinach. I would say that it would mostly be likened to a chicken marsala. However, the sauce is much lighter and the chicken breast was cooked perfectly! It was very moist! Mike ordered the Ravioli, which was also equally as delicious. It was also very different looking from a normal ravioli dish. Most ravioli dishes have little raviolis but this dish was like one big ravioli! It was very aesthetically pleasing and even more so for the taste buds, although I only had a small bite and Mike would be a better judge of the Ravioli! LOL!
We didn't get dessert as we were running a little late to meet up with Mike's friend. As an overall, I would definitely return here, especially if we were stuck up in the UES late at night with little or no options available again.
Saturday (10/3) Shenanigans Part 1 - Mee Noodle Shop
Where shall I begin ...
This has to be one of the most interesting days ever and I'll tell you, I think my boyfriend, Mike, got to see what I'm REALLY like when i'm in starvation mode for the first time! Haha! Hot mess!
Well we started by heading out for our usual weekend walk (well I was hunting for a potential dress for my sister's engagement party coming up this saturday - yikes! Totally unsuccessful hunt ya'll ... i'm in freak out mode ... again.)
We stopped at this really skeevy lookin' spot called Mee Noodle Shop. If ya'll don't know it, it looks like an old school straight-out-of-taiwan-hole-in-the-wall, but they serve good food ya'll! Though I would say not all Mee Noodle Shops (there are several locations throughout the city) are created equal. The one on the west side isn't as good ... but the one we went to is on the east side.
Name: Mee Noodle Shop
Cuisine: Chinese/Szechuan
Address: 547 Second Avenue @ 49th Street
Price: Recession proof! Delish and cheap, could you ask for anything better? Only if you don't like chinese food, but then that's a personal problem .... oop....
Service: Not bad, not great. Don't expect anything stellar, but the guy pouring water was pretty much on his game.
The Food: Well don't venture too far out into things like chicken and broccoli, in my opinion. Stick to the basics, the traditional chinese fare: Mike and I ordered noodle soups (Mike - Roast Pork Noodle Soup; Me - Beef Noodle Soup) with the thin rice noodles! Yum! We also split the Cold Sesame Noodles (which are always phenomenal in my opinion!). The peanut sauce on the cold sesame noodles was nice and thick and the light soy sauce at the bottom and then mixed up gave the noodles a very nice taste especially with the egg spaghetti noodles. This is one of my favorites.
The noodle soups were good. I was expecting something a little different when I ordered my beef noodle soup. For those of you who know what I'm talking about, I was expecting a noodle soup in a soy sauce soup base with stewed beef, but I got a clear broth w/unstewed but just as good and tender beef.
The overall experience was good and Mike really enjoyed (it was his first time there!) the food. I will definitely be back in the future for a nice chinese meal!
This has to be one of the most interesting days ever and I'll tell you, I think my boyfriend, Mike, got to see what I'm REALLY like when i'm in starvation mode for the first time! Haha! Hot mess!
Well we started by heading out for our usual weekend walk (well I was hunting for a potential dress for my sister's engagement party coming up this saturday - yikes! Totally unsuccessful hunt ya'll ... i'm in freak out mode ... again.)
We stopped at this really skeevy lookin' spot called Mee Noodle Shop. If ya'll don't know it, it looks like an old school straight-out-of-taiwan-hole-in-the-wall, but they serve good food ya'll! Though I would say not all Mee Noodle Shops (there are several locations throughout the city) are created equal. The one on the west side isn't as good ... but the one we went to is on the east side.
Name: Mee Noodle Shop
Cuisine: Chinese/Szechuan
Address: 547 Second Avenue @ 49th Street
Price: Recession proof! Delish and cheap, could you ask for anything better? Only if you don't like chinese food, but then that's a personal problem .... oop....
Service: Not bad, not great. Don't expect anything stellar, but the guy pouring water was pretty much on his game.
The Food: Well don't venture too far out into things like chicken and broccoli, in my opinion. Stick to the basics, the traditional chinese fare: Mike and I ordered noodle soups (Mike - Roast Pork Noodle Soup; Me - Beef Noodle Soup) with the thin rice noodles! Yum! We also split the Cold Sesame Noodles (which are always phenomenal in my opinion!). The peanut sauce on the cold sesame noodles was nice and thick and the light soy sauce at the bottom and then mixed up gave the noodles a very nice taste especially with the egg spaghetti noodles. This is one of my favorites.
The noodle soups were good. I was expecting something a little different when I ordered my beef noodle soup. For those of you who know what I'm talking about, I was expecting a noodle soup in a soy sauce soup base with stewed beef, but I got a clear broth w/unstewed but just as good and tender beef.
The overall experience was good and Mike really enjoyed (it was his first time there!) the food. I will definitely be back in the future for a nice chinese meal!
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
The Start of the Journey - Pio Pio
All right my loyal avid readers (snicker, snicker!) the start of this journey began roughly in April 2009 when a certain "beloved" of mine decided he didn't want to be anymore ... and the wonderment began ...
Well the start of all this and it will be the end of all this, is my absolute fave grubhouse ... and we do get down when we get there ...
PIO PIO (http://www.piopionyc.com/)
Locations:
Well the start of all this and it will be the end of all this, is my absolute fave grubhouse ... and we do get down when we get there ...
PIO PIO (http://www.piopionyc.com/)
Locations:
- UES - 1746 1st Avenue b/w 90th & 91st Sts
- Murray Hill - 210 East 34th Street b/w 2nd & 3rd Aves
- Hell's Kitchen -604 10th Avenue b/w 43rd & 44th Sts
- Bronx - 264 Cypress Avenue
Prices:
ba-da-da-da-daaaa I'm lovin' it! If you feelin' the recession but you still wanna be able to go out and eat with friends and feel like a human being vs a hermit and still get fed well, get truckin'! There are lots more locations throughout the boroughs (these are the ones I've been to), check out their website for additional locations.
Fare: Peruvian
The Review:
The food is deeeeelicious! Now, they're supposed to be Peruvian and if you go to the UWS, Hell's Kitchen or Jackson Heights location you will get the "extended menu" with the full Peruvian fare (however, the traditional peruvian fare is not as purse string friendly). What I love about this place is the ROTISSERIE CHICKEN!!! A Whole chicken pio is $10 and they have different combos that you can work out with your friends and all of the additional platitos or side dishes are $3-$4. You can't beat that kids!
You have to try the Chicken Pio, Saffron Rice & Beans (to die for!), Maduros and Yuca Fritas! Their calamari is something to be had as well, do NOT miss out on those bad boys! Everyone I have ever taken to Pio Pio and has had the Matador Combo with has L.O.V.E.D. I.T.!!!! Take yourself here, have a glass of SANGRIA ($6-$7), and actually I think they have the best Sangria in town and their pitcher is affordable and HUGE!!!! The staff and service is a little spotty sometimes but that may only be due to the fact that Pio Pio is ALWAYS packed!!!
I will definitely be back, I've already been there a gajillion times, they should just give me my own table and an open tab, lol!
Monday, September 28, 2009
New Chapter - Foodieville
All right kids ... so I've decided to take my blog in a different direction ... apparently, i'm lovin' good eatin' again ... and have been eatin' very good! =)
I have a very special person to thank ... but if you know me, well, then you know who it is and there's no need for me to divulge more than I need to as I've decided that I'm going to start blogging about all of the great little restaurants and bars that I've been to recently (starting Memorial Day Weekend 2009) and all of the great noshes that I've been having ... I'm a little behind but hopefully I'll be able to catch you up to all of these great spots!
As a point, if you've heard for a hot new spot with some viciously good food, social scene and/or drinks, let me know and I'll check it out first if you aren't quite sure whether or not you want to be the one to take the first toe dip.
I won't be starting any reviews on this post - I'm at work so I gotta keep this short and sweet but did want to give you all an update but some of the places that I will be covering include:
1. A Casa Fox
2. Permanent Brunch
3. El Porron
4. Maya
5. Felice
6. Fatty Fish
7. La Palapa
8. The Perfect Pint
9. Duke's
10. Pio Pio
11. Mr. Biggs
12. Five Napkin Burger
13. Five Guys Burger
14. Spitzer's
15. Bo Green House
16. Houston's @ Hillstones
17. Porch
18. Black Finn
19. Maya
20. The Thirsty Scholar
21. Pommes Frites
22. The Bourgeois Pig
23. Porchetta
24. Su Casa
25. Van Diemen's
26. Hill
27. Baoguette
28. La Giara
29. Slate Plus
30. Whitehorse
31. Hell's Kitchen
32. Otto
33. Sidebar
34. Vig27
35. Barking Dog Cafe
36. Public House
37. No. 7
38. Joshua Tree
39. Stir
40. Baker Street
41. Natural Tofu
42. PJ Clarke's
43. Gonzalez y Gonzalez
44. Blue Owl Lounge
45. Frying Pan
46. Lobster Bar
47. Mercury Bar
48. Vero
49. Sutton Place
50. Turtle Bay
51. Uncorked
52. Ricardo's Steakhouse
53. Bar Vetro
54. 8th Street Wine Cellar
55. Empire Rooftop Bar
56. Mee Noodle Shop
57. Beer Bar
58. Sweet and Vicious
59. Soho Park
60. 218 Bar
61. Opia
62. Mama Mexico
So I will give the addresses and locations of these places later ... but I'm going to be reviewing bars, hotspots, restaurants and the like! I hope you guys have just as much fun exploring the city with me!
I have a very special person to thank ... but if you know me, well, then you know who it is and there's no need for me to divulge more than I need to as I've decided that I'm going to start blogging about all of the great little restaurants and bars that I've been to recently (starting Memorial Day Weekend 2009) and all of the great noshes that I've been having ... I'm a little behind but hopefully I'll be able to catch you up to all of these great spots!
As a point, if you've heard for a hot new spot with some viciously good food, social scene and/or drinks, let me know and I'll check it out first if you aren't quite sure whether or not you want to be the one to take the first toe dip.
I won't be starting any reviews on this post - I'm at work so I gotta keep this short and sweet but did want to give you all an update but some of the places that I will be covering include:
1. A Casa Fox
2. Permanent Brunch
3. El Porron
4. Maya
5. Felice
6. Fatty Fish
7. La Palapa
8. The Perfect Pint
9. Duke's
10. Pio Pio
11. Mr. Biggs
12. Five Napkin Burger
13. Five Guys Burger
14. Spitzer's
15. Bo Green House
16. Houston's @ Hillstones
17. Porch
18. Black Finn
19. Maya
20. The Thirsty Scholar
21. Pommes Frites
22. The Bourgeois Pig
23. Porchetta
24. Su Casa
25. Van Diemen's
26. Hill
27. Baoguette
28. La Giara
29. Slate Plus
30. Whitehorse
31. Hell's Kitchen
32. Otto
33. Sidebar
34. Vig27
35. Barking Dog Cafe
36. Public House
37. No. 7
38. Joshua Tree
39. Stir
40. Baker Street
41. Natural Tofu
42. PJ Clarke's
43. Gonzalez y Gonzalez
44. Blue Owl Lounge
45. Frying Pan
46. Lobster Bar
47. Mercury Bar
48. Vero
49. Sutton Place
50. Turtle Bay
51. Uncorked
52. Ricardo's Steakhouse
53. Bar Vetro
54. 8th Street Wine Cellar
55. Empire Rooftop Bar
56. Mee Noodle Shop
57. Beer Bar
58. Sweet and Vicious
59. Soho Park
60. 218 Bar
61. Opia
62. Mama Mexico
So I will give the addresses and locations of these places later ... but I'm going to be reviewing bars, hotspots, restaurants and the like! I hope you guys have just as much fun exploring the city with me!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
A little ...
I always thought I was a commitment phobe ... and I was while I was in California. I even had an allergic reaction to a guy (Long Beach cop) I was dating who called me "his girl" and my whole face broke out in an allergic reaction. It was horrific. Anyways, so I recently was in my longest term relationship, it's been a little over a year and a half. I was so happy and content. Then out of the blue (with the aid of liquid courage) my boyf calls me and tells me that he doesn't feel like he's "contributing" enough. WTF?! I guess I could see why a Bronx-born, proud, young man would feel that way. But still ... it hurts and now i'm very lonely and suddenly the prospect of being single is, not very exciting. I really saw myself with this guy ... forever. You know ... married. I guess I was wrong. I'm not even interested in dating at all ... not with like my other ex ... (Mr. Con Man), I don't want to be spending these days alone, I just want Putz to come back and stay with me. We're eachother's best friend and I'm not even comfortable talking to him anymore. It's so sad. We used to cook together and now i've lost my love to cook. I want to play my xbox 360 games but they remind me of him (we used to play together). I don't like being single. I don't sleep, I don't eat. My love to eat died. I don't sleep b/c of my previous jobs and when he wouldn't spend the night, I wouldn't sleep but when he would come over that's when i got my best sleep. My whole body just was so happy and content when he was here, I could totally relax and now ... that's gone. I'm thinking of taking up sleeping aids to help me sleep. I'm just not sleeping and it's taking it's toll on me.
It's hard to thank GOD through this, but there's a reason why this happened. I don't know why, but I have to THANK him for it all. Give him the glory and the praise. I mean I still have many more things to be grateful for ... I'm still so immensely BLESSED. How can I let one little hang up like this depress me so much?? I just don't understand. I have GREAT, loving and supportive friends, I have a wonderful family that's healthy and well. I have both my eyes, ears, arms, and legs. I have my health, I have a job that's in no danger of "lay off" despite the economic climate, I have 2 wonderful dogs who love me unconditionally no matter how much i ignore them b/c of my own hang ups. I have benefits; dental, medical and vision! I am utterly and completely BLESSED, and yet ... a breakup and i'm totally devastated. I feel totally lost. I feel totally alone although I know better. I know that GOD promised me that he would NEVER EVER leave me and he hasn't. But I'm just ... heartbroken. I'm sad and that's OK ... coz everyday, it gets a little bit easier ... I'm a little happier. I'm a little less sad ... I cry a little less ... I smile a little more ... I laugh a little more ... I feel a little less like a failure ... I feel a little more confident ... I'm a little less heartbroken.
Thanks ya'll for listening, every little bit helps.
It's hard to thank GOD through this, but there's a reason why this happened. I don't know why, but I have to THANK him for it all. Give him the glory and the praise. I mean I still have many more things to be grateful for ... I'm still so immensely BLESSED. How can I let one little hang up like this depress me so much?? I just don't understand. I have GREAT, loving and supportive friends, I have a wonderful family that's healthy and well. I have both my eyes, ears, arms, and legs. I have my health, I have a job that's in no danger of "lay off" despite the economic climate, I have 2 wonderful dogs who love me unconditionally no matter how much i ignore them b/c of my own hang ups. I have benefits; dental, medical and vision! I am utterly and completely BLESSED, and yet ... a breakup and i'm totally devastated. I feel totally lost. I feel totally alone although I know better. I know that GOD promised me that he would NEVER EVER leave me and he hasn't. But I'm just ... heartbroken. I'm sad and that's OK ... coz everyday, it gets a little bit easier ... I'm a little happier. I'm a little less sad ... I cry a little less ... I smile a little more ... I laugh a little more ... I feel a little less like a failure ... I feel a little more confident ... I'm a little less heartbroken.
Thanks ya'll for listening, every little bit helps.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Pets! Too Hilarious!
Hi Everyone! I know it's been a VERY VERY VERY VERY, did I happen to mention VERY long time since I last posted. That's how busy work has been for me and that's generally when I'm on the computer. Also, being that I spend 8 hours a day, 5 days a week on a computer for a grand total of approximately 40 hours on the computer per week, I do try not to be on the computer too much at night or on the weekends as I would prefer to be outside walking my dogs, hanging out with friends and being active! =) That being said, I did manage to find a hilarious email that I would like to share with everyone! I laughed, I hope you do too!
~~~~
The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door:
Dear Dogs and Cats:
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, however. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.
The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:
TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:
(1) They live here. You don't.
(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'niture.
(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
(4)To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.
(5)Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
(a) eat less,
(b) don't ask for money all the time,
(c) are easier to train,
(d) normally come when called,
(e) never ask to drive the car,
(f) don't hang out with drug-using people,
(g) don't smoke or drink,
(h) don't want to wear your clothes,
(i) don't have to buy the latest fashions,
(j) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and,
(k) if they get pregnant, you can sometimes sell their children
~~~~
The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door:
Dear Dogs and Cats:
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, however. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.
For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.
The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.
Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:
TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:
(1) They live here. You don't.
(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'niture.
(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
(4)To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.
(5)Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
(a) eat less,
(b) don't ask for money all the time,
(c) are easier to train,
(d) normally come when called,
(e) never ask to drive the car,
(f) don't hang out with drug-using people,
(g) don't smoke or drink,
(h) don't want to wear your clothes,
(i) don't have to buy the latest fashions,
(j) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and,
(k) if they get pregnant, you can sometimes sell their children
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